Frequently Asked Questions
What is a Relationship & Intimacy Coach?
A relationship & intimacy coach is a person that offers insights into your current erotic and intimate life. They can help you overcome your relationship barriers and move forward in your erotic journey, wherever that may be. Relationship & intimacy coaches guide you towards practical application to improve your sex and intimate life. They offer a safe environment to explore shame, fears and fantasies.
Who is Relationship & Intimacy Coaching for?
Relationship & Intimacy coaching is for anyone that wants to improve their relationship to their sexuality, understand their eroticism, learn to connect to their partner or want to spice up their sex life. This form of coaching is for anyone that has a body and wants to learn new ways of exploring themselves.
What’s the difference between a sex therapist and sex & intimacy coach?
A sex therapist is a licensed mental health professional with additional education in sexuality and sex topics. Their training can involve as little as 8 hours or more. They often look at a person’s childhood, past history and any traumas to help you understand how you arrived to where you are.
Will what I share remain confidential?
I work with a strict confidential code of conduct. Anything that happens in our sessions is confidential. No one will know you are working with me unless you share that information with that person. I do attend regular supervision with other licensed sex coaches to ensure best practice and none of your personal details are revealed.
I’m worried I don’t know how to have a conversation with my partner about our intimate life. How can I open the conversation?
Every couple is different in their communication style. This can be a potentially sticky subject to open. Find a time when you can both be present and not distracted, haven’t had any alcohol or under any other influences and away from the bedroom. Approach your partner with compassion and vulnerability. Speak from your point of view, using “I” statements, and steer clear of any accusatory / blaming language. Make the conversation one of wanting to be more deeply connected to them and one of curiosity (are they feeling disconnected too, how do they feel, what are their solutions).
I feel too much shame to attend one of your public events. What can I do instead?
I completely understand that stepping into this area of your life can feel a bit scary. If attending a live event feels too much out of your comfort zone you can book a Passionate Possibilities call to see if privately working together would be the right fit or if we’ve worked together before scheduling a private Milk & Honey Coaching call.
Do I have to have a partner in order to sign-up for a coaching package or attend a live event? Will I still benefit from your coaching?
You do not need to have a partner or be in a relationship to benefit from coaching or to attend an event*. Learning about your pleasure first is a remarkable step towards liberating your own sexual creative life force.
*Events for couples/partners are labelled as such.
I’ve been in a sexless marriage/relationship, what can I do?
First I’d like to thank you for your bravery in coming forward. I know this is not an easy place to be in. There isn’t a one size fits all solution. There are so many factors to take into account, like how long this has been happening, do both parties want to heal this and what is the health of the relationship. Please book in a Passionate Possibilities call where we can brainstorm your next steps.
I experience a lot of shame around sex. Can you help me?
Feeling shameful about sex is very common. I can help you, help yourself but only if you are ready. I have a variety of embodiment tools that can help you begin shedding and releasing your sex shame.
My partner isn’t as adventurous as me, what do you suggest?
The best way to approach a partner, especially an apprehensive one about trying new things is out of the bed and not during sex. Have a clear, open conversation about what you would like while taking the time to understand their fears. Take the time to find out what might be a real turn-on for them.
My partner wants to do things I’m not comfortable with?
Understanding what makes you feel uncomfortable about what your partner is suggesting may be the first step. Is it shame, guilt or lack of body confidence. Take the time to clearly communicate this with your partner. Be genuinely curious about understanding what your partner wants to do, understand their turn-on of that particular activity. Is there a way to create that turn-on differently? Is there a way to create a scenario you feel safe with? Always honour your ‘no’. And possibly use it as an opportunity to explore your discomfort
Are you open to working with people who live alternative lifestyles and relationship models such as polyamory, nonmonagamy, kink etc and members of the LGBTQ community?